Saturday, January 8, 2011

Introduction of myself and kind of a synopsis of the last 7-8 years

So this was suppose to be something I was going to keep typed in a Word document and then try to publish it along with my brothers memoir on his self... But what can I say... I got lazy... And tired. Period.

I guess I'll introduce myself. My name is Julie.. I'm 26 and a firefighter and paramedic for the county I live in. I love it and wouldn't trade my job for anything in the world. I have a great mom and dad that live across county lines and a younger brother, who is 2 years and 2 days younger then me- And the only blood related brother God has given me. Kevin is a great person and would do anything for anyone.... His only down fall is he is a chronic alcoholic who suffers from borderline personality disorder. If anyone is curious to what borderline personality disorder exactly is, here's a short definition: Borderline personality disorder is a condition in which a person makes impulsive actions, and has an unstable mood and chaotic relationships.

For the last 7-8 years, my brother has been in and out of treatment centers from Minneapolis, MI down to Galveston, TX. Kevin has been unable to hold a stable job, go to school, or have a stable place to live. In the state of Kansas, my brother is considered homeless. There was a good 16 months while my brother was in Galveston that he was sober and headed down a great road. He had his own home about 2 blocks from the beach, had a job he liked, and was going to school. Then in 2008, Hurricane Ike came ripping through the gulf, crushing what my brother had begin to make of his new life. Shortly after, my brother's life fell apart again and he started drinking and self medicating himself with Valium and whatever else could ease the pain. There is about 10 million more things to this story, but they aren't even worth repeating. Every since Ike, my brother has been in and out of hospitals, mental health facilities, etc. He's been through multiple jobs, multiple friendships, and multiple places to live.

December 21, 2010, while at work, I had to place my brother under involuntary commitment after he had gone on a drinking binge, began popping benzodiazepines like they were PEZ candy and decided to get suicidal. Now keep in mind... This is the 3rd time that year he had been placed under involuntary commitment to a mental health facility. The 1st time, mom and dad did it. The 2nd time (on our birthdays) and the 3rd time (right before Christmas) I took over and did it.. My folks have given alot into trying to get my brother help. They needed a break. A BIG break.

My brother just recently got out of the MH(mental health) hospital 4 days ago.. It only took him 1 day to get back to his old ways.... Its now been 3 days and none of us have heard from him...

Its a waiting game with my brother........... You're either waiting to see if he will want your help. Or you are waiting to see if you are planning his funeral. This blog is going to basically talk about this waiting period... or period of hell... whatever you'd like to call it...

The reason I'm doing this blog, is not to sit here and tell my brother's business to everyone. Its to tell me and my family's story of how we feel, how we try to get through the day or don't get through the day, and to hopefully make someone else out there who feels like they are alone with a same/similar situation like they are not alone. Feel free to message me about things we've done, haven't done, need to try, or even if you just have a story you want to share. Trust me... its REALLY nice to not feel like you are alone in this. Thanks and hope you guys can get something out of this.

(P.S. Sorry if there are some misspelled words or my sentences are a little out of wack... I'm completely exhausted!!!!)

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